Degree Takes the Cake!

Today was one of those irritating days where it is gloomy and cloudy and terrible out, yet it just won't rain! So frustrating. I mean, if it has to be dark and gross, might as well complete the picture and add some precipitation. Right? It makes things a little bit more exciting...although it also adds the potential for Wet Pant Syndrome, which is one of the most horrible fake syndromes out there. The horror of the wet legs of your pants getting stuck to your calves and then the dirt that is brought with it, oooh it all is just a nightmare.

Anyhoo, I once again spent the day schlepping around Miss Jane and wasting time in the parking lot of the lovely Senior Center Park...which today I discovered has a pool as well! Who knew!? The whole chill factor was great because I could actually sit comfortably with the engine off and the windows cracked...as opposed to sweating away my life until I couldn't stand it anymore and then have to find another parking lot to sit in so I have an excuse to turn on the car and enjoy a few minutes of blasting the AC.

In other news, I got a new flavor of deodorant. And not only is it a new flavor, I also went with a new brand! The old Ban Paradise Winds was finally starting to fail slightly after many years of faithful service and I thought I could use a change. Degree Sexy Intrigue it is! Alright, now let's take a few to check out the fact that they named a product that is specifically tailored for your armpit and then named it SEXY Intrigue. What is sexy about my armpit? Perhaps Degree has the power to do that, I don't know. It's pretty magical. It smells really great...doesn't exactly halt the flow of perspiration like a dream but hey, what normal deodorant does? Still smells pretty lovely post-perspiration, and that's really the only thing that is non-negotiable in the deodorant search for perfection. So I'd say, ladies and gents, we have a winner!

Don't worry, I'll let you know how Secret Cocoa Butter Kiss works out when I decide to test that puppy out (I grabbed the 97 cent sample just for kicks). I know you'll be waiting on the edge of your seat...

FYI: The Medical Field Requires a Little Set of Necessary Social Skills

Well I thought I had graduated from the whole oral surgery debacle, buuuut no. Not quite. See, I went to visit Dr. Silvey for my twice annual teeth cleaning (can't forget about dental hygiene!) and let him know that hey, I think it's starting to swell again and it kinda hurts. Come to find out...it is infected...again. He poked and prodded with his terrible shiny, silver, and sharp tools that I have nightmares about and drained some of the nastiness and then shipped me off to see Dr. Fear again. IIII do not like that man. It just amazes me that people that cannot even be civil (let alone sociable) are allowed to get jobs in the health field. They are aware that they will be seeing people every single day for the majority of the day, right? Hmmm...perhaps the whole med school thing needs a disclaimer, a warning label if you will. Warning: People are involved in this profession. Learn to like them...or get out. That would suffice.

In other doctoral news, ran into good ol' Dr. Kadakia at Potbelly's annnd he actually knew who I was! Amazing I tell you, amazing. Mad props to Dr. Kadak. Hahahahaha. At least he knows how to converse and be normal...

Milk Was A Bad Choice

It's hot...

Don't worry though because I have my fan on speed three. Everything is going to be a-okay.

It's Monday...

Don't worry though because we started the "work" week off with a bang. No swim practice (and no case of the Mondays)! AKA eat Panera for two meals, shop at Target, play Guitar Hero, play some Trouble (what a great game! How soon I forget these things...), then a drop off at Huron Valley so I could feel really great about not being able to go in...sigh. OH! AND THE BACHELORETTE! Monday means The Bachelorette! So I shall be tuning in for two hours of greatness (don't worry, I'm well aware of the fact that it's pretty horrible and fails the majority of the time...buuut I still enjoy it...I'm not afraid to admit that part of things).

It's 2:30...

Don't worry though because my dentist appointment isn't until Wednesday and my OSCR meeting isn't until four. Oooh OSCR...what a horrible review you are going to receive...

It's June 22...

Don't worry though because there's over two months of summer to go...crazy that the Fourth is coming so quickly though!

Okay that's enough of that...it's more than likely that it got old by the end annnd I've also run out of things to say. Okay great.

This Whole Gregorka Zoo Thing is Becoming a Reality

The Gregorka Zoological Park annual Christmas (well really New Years) letter has been an ongoing joke for as long as I can remember. We are a highly anti-animal family (besides the allowance of our pet Brian)...err it's headed by very anti-animal people so it's really actually ridiculous that we refer to ourselves as a zoo. Hahaha I suppose we were enough to handle...without adding the zoo aspect on top of it all. ANYWAYS.

It all started with the bats (during some winter month...I think)...that we discovered due to Brian's apparent superior sense of hearing. Lots of little scratchy noises do not in fact always mean mice, you could be graced with the presence of the friendly batty creatures instead! Right so...we had Critter Control come and do their thing. Their thing otherwise known as install some sort of device which allows the birds of the night to peace out of the house, but not re-enter...in the spring...when they were done with the whole vacation from life known as hibernation (gosh how great would that be?!).

Anyways. We upgraded this summer to the peacock. Yes, a peacock. It was a female which kinda sorta sucks, cuz they don't have that flashy tail their male counterparts are graced with, but I'm not complaining. Apparently there are a few that just roam about southeast Michigan? I'm not too sure...I have eavesdropped and overheard so many different explanations of how they wound up on Ridgemor that I just go with my first explanation. It supposedly has exited the area...not sure if it got sick of the scenery around these parts or if it was forced to find some new walking grounds...but it's gone.

Finally we had the woodpecker rather recently. The highly intellectual bird flew into the garage, but couldn't seem to figure out how to get out. And it flipped out anytime anyone went near it, knocking its head on the ceiling (most likely causing even more damage to its tiny bird brain). Who knows. Faj backed his car out so that it wouldn't get bombed by little bird turds and then he rescued the thing. Now he's really proud of his efforts when it comes to this gigantic feat, so don't poke fun. Faj had the genius to chase Woody the Woodpecker around the garage, get it under the umbrella, and direct it out to a safe flight zone. Who knew. So many talents. It's mind-boggling at times.

So yes, perhaps we need to change the newsletter to the Gregorka Aviary...doesn't quite have the same ring though...

Rollercoaster Basement

Now, I'm all about the whole basement being finished thing...but it has its ups and downs:

1. UP: I am greeted by people I don't know on a daily basis.
2. DOWN: There are always cars in the driveway...which blocks my view out the window to see whether or not the Taurus is still here. This means I am forced to walk outside or upstairs to the window with the correct angled view to figure out if I'm stranded or not.
3. UP: I have the opportunity to hear snippets of some very interesting conversations.
4. DOWN: It's official. Those involved in the building line of work have no concept of hygiene. Not once has anyone washed their hands after using the bathroom...thank goodness the plumbing is installed downstairs so I don't have to tally that sad stat any longer.
5. UP: We're going to have a sweet basement...duh.
6. DOWN: I have to be half of an awkward three second conversation while workers walk through the mudroom en route to the bathroom.

But yes, we can see the light at the end of the tunnel for the basement. Carpet is coming soon, then some furniture, then a TV, and we should be pretty good to go...after the Brain and I clean every item on the dust ridden side and move it into the fancy new side...yaaay.

"I Apologize For My Grandma Being Wasted"

Wellp. Sarah and I made the trek up to Lincoln, MI (near Alpena) to visit Amy (Sarah's fellow Buff) and her wonderful grandparents (Bud and Sallie...with an 'ie')!

Lot's of parentheses back there...so ANYWAYS...the drive up went fairly well. We got all the way there...and then drove up and down Barlow Road (only for twenty minutes) looking for Fox Road...the elusive Fox Road. Golly gee. After even pulling in to the gated community of Lost Lake Woods and backing out because we thought we were wrong, we finally decided to stop at the Citgo down the way and chat up the folks behind the counter to figure out where the heck we were supposed to be. Turns out the gated community WAS Fox Road and that our intuition was correct. Why there was no street sign, I'm not quite sure. And I mean, MapQuest could have been a pal and thrown us a hint about the whole gated expanse of land that was to be our destination. Oh well, they are forgiven.

So, we arrived at our destination thanks to Amy coming to our rescue in the purple Tracker. Received a lovely salutation from the grands and then schlepped everything inside! We got the basement area...then got the tour since there were multiple ways to escape...so many doors! The cool spiral staircase took us through the bedroom, the back staircase took us through the garage, there was a door straight to the outdoor world from the basement...a little crazy. If there were ever a fire it would probably be hard to choose!

For our first activity we took the neighbor's golf cart out to tour the Lost Lake Woods' surroundings...played in a park, almost died sliding around on gravel, scoped out the club house, and enjoyed the freezing cold gray weather. Then we went on into Alpena to take a look around. Twas a cute place! Stopped at Lake Huron for a quick gander and feel of the water, picked up t-shirts to tie dye at KMart and then stopped in Jo Ann Fabric for the actual dye supplies (which took an eternity because the lady couldn't work the register and I was trying to get the sale price...gee whiz), toured the little town, and then headed back for some dinner! Beer in the Rear Chicken it was! YUM. Had some of that, did some tie dying, and then played a rousing game of dominoes. I was doing well...until the end rounds...but I ended up in third place so it was alright.

Day two...woke up to the rain, so our horseback riding time slot was moved to the following day. Boo. We just hung out most of the day...ate a little, watched a lot of TV, counted down the minutes until The Bachelorette was to be on, went out to the stables to see the horses (since I had never been in close proximity of one...AHH) and fell in love with Johnny, played with the barn cats, more TV, a trip to the store in Lincoln for cake mix, frosting, marshmallow fluff, chips, and my favorite Queso (MMM!), hamburgers for dinner, cupcake creation, BACHELORETTE! (thank goodness the two stupidest ones were finally kicked...took long enough), stupid storm warnings that interrupted our viewing experience and didn't even pertain to our area, a lot of cupcake consumption, and then bed.

Day three, the final day. :( Got up for a great breakfast at Connie's. A HUGE cinnamon roll that the three of us split (SO good and nutty and delicious) at the cute local little place (we were surrounded by pretty much just old men...and one old woman). Hung out there for awhile and then headed back to prepare for the horseback riding experience...woah nervous. Since the Maj is terrified of horses, we've never ridden them, much less gotten very close to them so I was slightly shaking in my tennis shoes. I was given Cinnamon...the horse that likes people but not other horses...so I had to be in the back so no one was all up in his rear on the trail. Anyways...Cinnamon loves to look around and take in the scenery rather than focus on keeping up with the rest of the group. We had a grand ol' time lollygagging around in the back, grabbing meals to go along the way, until she would realize that 'Oh hey, look how far away the rest of the horses are, maybe I should catch up or something' and then would start RUNNING to catch up. Oooh boy. I was only thwapped by a few tree branches, only got one scrape from when she tripped and I hit the saddle funny with my hand, and naturally my butt is RATHER bruised. Yikes. But all in all, it was really fun! I didn't know I would actually like horses...and who knew their noses were so soft? Hahahaha.

After that experience we headed back to the home unit, ate some chips and queso, and packed up to leave. :( The attempt to get home was a little bit more difficult than getting up there...

We didn't have the MapQuest directions for the opposite direction, but we're not THAT dumb so we figured we could do it...we got a ways out there...about an hour, when we encountered a stoplight. Now, there aren't very many stoplights up in those parts and I remembered a Subway attached to a Shell station, so we took our turn here...turns out it was not correct. It took about a half an hour to fix that one, but it was fine once we got back on track and we found a lot more lakes hidden back there! So yeah...turns out there were three stoplights in this 20-some mile stretch annnd yeah. Oh well. Then it was smooth sailing the rest of the way thank goodness.

Now I'm home! And sore in the buttocks region...but glad to be back in the company of warm weather...the whole low 40s and rainy stuff, not so great in the summertime...

An Evening of Crack

Last night proved to be filled with a lot of butt humor...

Coming home from downtown I witnessed an interesting couple engage in a short grope session. Tall skinny dude and a rather large and in charge woman on the corner...the dude's hand traveled all over her back, slowly creeping toward the badonkadonk. Don't worry, cuz it made it there! He proceeded to be allll over her ass for the entire "Don't Walk" period of time. Really sir? You do realize that you are not Invisiboy and that other people in DOWNTOWN ANN ARBOR have a clear view of what behavior you are choosing to engage in!? Yikes. Sometimes I wonder.

Then pulling into the good ol' street to home base, my eyes were greeted with the neighbor's butt crack. While working hard with the pile of mulch and trying to distribute it, this dude's pants were slip sliding south allowing Captain Crack to come out and play. Such a wonderful welcome home image, every street corner should get one.

Updates on the witch factor (otherwise known as my black hair):

• Momma Jann did some online research for me last night and we found out that Prell shampoo fades the color faster...therefore, I went to CVS this morning and picked up some Prell. Promptly showered and washed my hair another six times (I try to wash it six times per shower) and found out that the Prell smell is not my favorite. I am currently waiting for it to dry...
• I am considering going Goth for the time being, just to match my hair, and to please the Faj.
• I received a compliment from the Faj about my original hair color last night (this is a rare occurrence folks!)...this was followed up by Faj informing me that I wouldn't be needing a car and that I could use the Family Broomstick to get to Sarah's last night.
• Brian continues to yak about witch hazel...and yell "WITCH! SHE'S A WIIITCH!"
• Now I know why I always said I would never dye my hair. Oh well!

Vollis? Tenneyball? Tenneyball. Definitely tenneyball.

So. We played this game...err I guess we performed (?) this drill last night called Tennis at volleyball practice last night. Yeah I don't know what the whole hybrid sports thing is about either, but I mean, I went with it. So you have two people on each side of the net, and you face off in a doubles match. And naturally each side only gets one wallop to get the ball over the net. The whole point of it was to practice placement, but I went a wee bit nuts and was having a few issues. There was a swing and a near miss at one point (which I justified by saying that my platform to volleyball ratio should be equivalent to the ratio of the tennis ball to the racket...right? Common sense people), followed up by my participation as a plain ol' spectator (and a good one at that!) while my partner Annie tore up the court. Clearly I was never victorious, which is fine. I guess. 

SWG and I dyed my hair (don't worry, it washes out eventually...it just might take awhile). It's pretty much straight up black. As in, I look like a witch slash sorceress. Mhmmm. Yes Brian has his fun running around yelling "SHE'S A WITCH! WIIITCH!!!!" and asking me if my favorite plant is witch hazel. Clearly my favorite plant is witch hazel. Who doesn't love them some witch hazel. Anyways. The upside is that if you're ever so lucky to be in the same place at the same time as me, I'll be really clean. I shampooed six times this morning in the shower and I take at least two showers a day...if not more. I will admit that it is kind of fun to watch the purply-black color exit the hairs on my head through the froth of the shampoo. Another plus is that I'm also thinking of hosting my own Halloween in June trick-or-treatingpalooza. Because why not? I don't even have to wear a wig! I will go into it full well knowing that it will be an epic fail of an adventure, but A for effort, for myself. Oh geez, what am I saying. 

I am having the WORST shuffle experience of my life on iTunes as I type out this post on my horribly boring life. I don't know what I want to listen to (hence, I'm making the application do the work for me) and every song that comes on is not really pleasing to the ear canals as of right now. So basically, I just press next until I get tired of pressing the button and continue typing...typing merrily. Merrily due to the fact that ladies and gents, we just landed on a Christmas tune! Oh Holy Night to be exact. Yes, it is that bad.