Astro Doomsday...Coming soon to a Monday near you!

Astro Doomsday isn't until Monday...and anyone who knows me fairly well would know that it is highly difficult for extreme focus to occur this early in the game. I just can't justify hating life for longer than is necessary. Not like I'm doing anything of worth while I'm not studying...I just putz about the World Wide Web and eat and nap and pretend like exams are already over...oops. I'll kick it into gear tonight. I'm feeling it in my veins. No need to worry. This school causes people to just melt down...it's really difficult to be in the midst of numerous psychological breaks during exam time. But believe me, there are plenty to witness. Why, just the other day we had a collective scream in the kitchen because we just didn't know what else to do. Overload on the brain. My oh my. It's getting ugly. I can't wait to be done, at least for a couple weeks.

Anyways, at least I'm not as bad as the house on the corner of S. Division and Hill...their X-Mas Light Spectacular is the epitome of "I don't wanna study." You should probably check it out sometime. It's kind of sweet.

I actually don't have much anything else to say. Three exams down, one more to go. Moving home at some point...perchaps this weekend, but maybe not till Monday. It's difficult to decide. Slash everyone will be arriving throughout the weekend. I'm not sure. We'll figure it out eventually. And by we I mean me and my brain, perhaps when it has a chance to function normally once again?

Pardon the Hiatus

Oooof I apologize for the rather large hiatus. I was out with the plague...but that was really only the past week so it's not really a legitimate excuse for missing an entire month. Pretty sure I had nothing of comical and/or entertainment value to blab about to my imaginary audience. Just the same old rants about construction (yeah, they're still there...pretty sure the snow will not impede forward progress or blanket the amount of noise created) and such.

Anyways. Yesterday I discovered a building in Ann Arbor that absolutely reeks of Lays BBQ Potato Chips. On my way to dinner at Palio my nostrils were assaulted by the heavy scent and it didn't take more than two seconds to figure out why it was so familiar. The scented building resides on William Street, right next to Raja Rani...it's an apartment building of sorts...I'm not sure why it's producing that smell, but it could pass for a BBQ Lays Factory if I were, say, blind or something. So crazy.

I may have failed my quiz last night. Totally fine. No huge consequences, just have to take it again, but the sad part of it all is that when they handed it out the disclaimer was "This is the easiest quiz you'll ever take." Yeah, not so much. My mind was a bit jumbled. Perhaps I was still boggled by the BBQ Lays phenomenon. It's hard to say. Anyways, I haven't received an e-mail that said I failed yet, so I might be in the clear by some miracle. One of my answers for the "Who is the national president of APO?" question was "It's not Maggie Katz! Ha." Well. It actually is Maggie Katz. So that's just fantastic. Oh well. Not the end of the world. At least I don't receive letter grades from organizations...

The spanish oral exam was this morning...approximately forty minutes ago. Boy. I'm not sure. We'll see what comes of that...at least I successfully spoke in spanish for 9ish minutes. I think. I didn't say anything in english, so I'm gonna go ahead and view it as a success. Some of it might be considered Spanish Blabber That Doesn't Make Sense, but I don't mind. The Prof. knew I was really nervous...considering I was shaking and engaging myself in breathing exercises so I wouldn't toss the cookies everywhere. Yeah, joke life.

In other news, the Loser Cruiser is officially a victim of bullying. Not only was he attacked a couple weeks ago (and retains a permanent dent in his side as a reminder of the painful experience), but I walked out the door the other day to utilize this form of transportation only to find him donned with orange construction cones. I'm not sure if someone is playing some cruel construction joke on me, or is simply hating on the LC for no reason. It's difficult to determine. Either way, a stake out is in order...or something. Maybe Brain will booby trap it...that would be ideal.

Alright folks! That's all I've got. Lo siento for the largo pause in the written word from yours truly, but it's finals time...aka Crunch Time...so there might be another pause for a couple of weeks. Then again, I always say that and end up writing again a few days later as an excuse NOT to study...oooh poor life choices...

Useless Leaf Machines

I have officially discovered one of the most pointless, useless, inefficient machines on Michigan's campus. I would like to call it "The Leaf Pusher Arounder" with a tag line that reads something like this "A Poor Substitute to Good Old Fashioned Manual Labor." This machine looks a little bit like a mini street cleaner, with the quick rotating sweeps and everything...the only difference is that with the key word being "mini," the driver doesn't fit inside the cab nearly as well. I have come to find out that there is a consistent face for "Goodness gracious this thing is tiny get me out of here." Basically, they all just look miserable. It's similar to that face that everyone gets when there are far too many people squashed inside a car...

Anyways...this not-so-handy-dandy machine zips about collecting a major back up of leaves under its belly, and actually ends up missing about half of them or spewing out the overflow making it even more work to have to go back and get them again. It also has an extremely difficult time depositing the leaves when it wants to since they're all stuck in the crazy spinning broom. Basically, if the driver of the tiny Leaf Pusher Arounder and all his friends that stand around and watch were each to pick up, oh I don't know, a broom or something....(weird, I know) the job could be done in half the time. They just wouldn't be nearly as entertained...or squashed...and would actually have to put forth some effort...

That just might be asking too much...

Woopdy Doo. Head Lamps.

The construction workers across the street have high-tech helmets complete with HEAD LAMPS on them. Yeah. Lights, fastened to the front of their la-dee-fricken-dah helmets. Most likely so they can see the crazy girl across the street when she attacks, that girl being yours truly. Due to the fact that it is nearing one in the morning and this is most definitely NOT the first night these shenanigans have occurred, I felt the need to open up my window and let a few things be heard. I was mostly nice, but it was also very clear that they could hear me since when I let out a frustrated scream slash yell of sorts, hard hat McGee and his idiot friend both turned straight toward me and stopped banging on the metal parking garage infrastructure. Jesus H.

That is all. I shall now attempt to sleep...because I think they might have just left...then again, they'll be back right around five in the morning so I best be gettin' my full four hours of sleep in.

Awesome. Blossom.

Argh Matey!

I'm actually not really sure where the entire month of October went...it started with a birthday, and ends with Halloween...but as for in between those dates...well, they went along at warp speed! Fall Break in Colorado made the first half of the month forgettable because I was just waiting to get out there, and then school work and midterms exploded for the latter half making that just disappear into horribleness. Wow. Crazy.

This week is slightly blowtastic. Astro exam tomorrow, abstract for women's studies due tomorrow, two STUPID thematic reactions for spanish due Friday, I need to watch an hour and a half long terrible video on Panama or some other country in Central America and finish that video guide by Friday, spanish exam on Monday meaning the workbook is due Monday, Hayride on Thursday with APO (that one should be fun!), a bunch of meetings, kind of a large amount of class (including an extra hour of Women's Studies to watch some movie about something...ugh), but at least I finally figured out the Halloween costume...this might be my lamest Halloween yet.

I'm going to be a pirate. I feel like I can't wear the majority of the Maj's greatest creations because:

A) Most of them have a tail of some sort or a very large part to them (making it rather difficult to move in a room full of people)...

B) I don't want some IDIOT to spill on them.

C) I feel like people always have some horrible irresistible urge to touch them...because they're fuzzy or puffy or something equally exciting...I'm not sure...I just get irritated being bopped in the nose and such. Ayyyy.

I do hope I get more excited for Halloween as the date looms even closer because I'm not sure what the deal is. Perhaps I simply just have too much to do this week. Oh well! Time for Comm with KWAK. Yaaaay...

Micromini Meetings...the way they all should be

There is currently an "Asian Girls For Dating" ad on SpanishDict.com. "6000+ Chinese Girls Seek For Love." That's right folks! Get em' while they're hot...hahaha WHAT. Why in the world is THAT ad on the Spanish dictionary website...slash why does that ad even exist in the first place?!

Hokay. Moving on. On the way home from school today...at the corner of Jefferson and Division...I heard a very noisy man hawk up some sort of something, and then soon after realized that it was the man who was hanging out of a third story window just dropping huge spit bombs on the ground. Gross.

Just got back from the micromini meeting of the Night Ride Committee. Micromini meaning that there are only four people in it...and it lasts approximately six minutes each time. Beautiful. Clearly I can pick a winner...

A Tale of a Friendly Pedestrian

What I should be doing right now is writing one of my stupid 350 word thematic reactions for spanish...because my goal is to finish another one before Comm...but I mean, I can't neglect the bloggage. :)

Anyways. I just had a rather lovely encounter with a fellow pedestrian while crossing Division. Since we have that construction site thing going on (I don't know if you've heard about it...), there are plenty of large dump trucks and other various construction-y equipment vehicles. Today there happened to be one of those huge-mongous double trucks (ugh, what are those called...the ones they fill with dirt, or large chunks of concrete, or really anything someone might want in an extremely large quantity) complete with the WIDE LOAD sign strapped to its front bumper, attempting to start moving down the street (and as you all know, it takes a bit for these things to start moving...they lurch forward a few times and finally churn to life)...so this sir across the street and I are kind of paused watching it deciding whether or not we have an adequate amount of time to cross the street safely...and we're kind of going and stopping because we're really not sure...and then he just starts jogging across the street so I decide it's fine and start laughing and moving my rear across the street. The amazing thing was, that as we crossed the street I wasn't the only one laughing. Someone else, at the University of Michigan, thought something was funny and thought that it was actually okay to laugh about it, with *GASP* a complete stranger! Hahaha made my day. Or at least the a.m. portion of it!

Another funny thing I saw the other day was some rando girl on her bicycle. Okay, yes, plenty of people ride their bikes around campus, but they typically stick to the concrete areas. Now keep in mind this was an awkward time of day and there weren't throngs of people everywhere, but this girl decides that she just needs to ride all over the grass in front of Angell Hall...? I'm not sure. Maybe it's because I grew up being yelled at if a tire went near the grass...but typically I don't think that's the most normal of transit routes. Besides, it's way harder to ride a bike on the grass than on a solid surface, like say...mmm...the SIDEWALK?! Ay yi yi...

Okay. Thematic reaction me captain. Adios.

U of M > MSU

Just so you are all aware, the most feminine-looking janitor works in CC Little. He's petite, and proportioned...well, like a woman (minus the whole having a chest thing), he has really long blonde hair that he wears in a giant poofy ponytail every day, and well, I always do a double take when I encounter him roaming the halls or waiting for the elevator. Hmmm that might make me a horrible person.

I became a stalker the other day and successfully followed some random girl all the way from the Division and Jefferson intersection to the Alumni Center...which is quite a ways. This was not on purpose...I'm not creepy. But Welcome Wednesdays require me to stop by there for my free Barry Bagel and Sweetwaters coffee and it's kind of a popular place...the only problem was that we literally had the same walking speed and I was having some serious issues adjusting my pace. When I slow down, I get all antsy and feel like I'm making zero progress, but if I were to speed up I probably would have had to jog to pass her which is just super awkward. So, yes. I may have successfully induced neck soreness by causing mass amounts of anxiety and causing her to look back at me every three steps. I am legitimately sorry, heck, I know how that feels! I might be one of the most paranoid people around! Hahaha

I started this post in the middle of last week...and haven't been thinking in my blog state of mind...so I have very little to contribute even though a rather significant chunk of time has passed.

Also, Michigan will always be better than State. Just throwin' that little factoid out there...

The Greatest Country in the World

Whoopsie daisy! It has been quite awhile hasn't it? Either I've had a packed week and a half, or I have encountered zero things that are blogworthy. Clearly I've been busy.

Well actually, it's a little bit of both. Slash school and that whole continuing my education thing have gotten in the way of allowing my brain to wander off and phrase things in a semi-comical way as I sit around and do nothing. The sitting around doing nothing thing doesn't often happen...therefore, the phrasing is lacking.

Anyways...the construction is still clanging, pounding, and banging loud and proud over there. I have even taken the time to record it and post it on people's Facebook walls, just so they can appreciate the musical jingle of hammers on metal beams, saws through who knows what kind of material, the wonderful vocals put on by men in hard hats yelling (a million David Hodos running about the area), and that joyous deafening clickety-clack of the crane. Golly I can't wait until Fall of 2010...the projected end date for this wonderful project, but considering we're dealing with the University, well, let's be honest, that probably will not happen. This better be one heck of a parking garage by the time they're done with it. Sigh...

Naturally I've been wearing my USA garb about campus for various reasons:

1. We live here.
2. I look pretty decent in the red and navy...the white tends to have Casper the Friendly Ghost effects upon my skin tone...
3. Uhhh did you hear my sister went to the Olympics? Yeah...
4. It's generally a good conversation topic or interesting tidbit if asked
5. I have plenty of it!
6. It's mainly in the t-shirt and comfy clothing realm...so I can wear it every freaking day if I really want to.
7. I occasionally receive comments by random passers-by via bicycle...[okay, so this only happened once while I was on my way to class and some man rode by on his bike. But I gave a little greeting nod plus half smile and first received a very robust "USA!" followed up by what I think was a comment on how it's the greatest country in the world--then again I cannot be sure because we were traveling in opposite directions and were relatively far apart by this point...oh and I also had my iPod going...more than likely with Miley Cyrus' "Party in the USA..." ohhh the irony...]

In other news...the Class of 1959 (such cute little old people) adorned the steps of Angell Hall today for a beautiful group photo op and were spotted all over campus today...I'm not sure what the dealio was, but hey, it's kind of fun to see that. Hard to imagine that I'll be that old someday, but hey, hopefully it'll happen! Hahaha.

Skyline volleyball home tournament tomorrow, bright and really early...here we go Eagles!

Long Live The Squirrels

Today I witnessed a newsworthy event in a state of complete and utter amusement as I crossed the four way stop at E. Jefferson and Thompson: A woman driving a Honda Civic Hybrid made it through the intersection and then after making a complete stop for a SQUIRREL, she honked at it, waited until it was clear of the danger of her tires, and then continued on her merry way. I started laughing out loud, but was quickly silenced by quite a few not-so-nice glares...it might not have helped that I had my iPod in...who knows. Judger McJudgersons.

In other news..."Your Cosmic Context: An Introduction to Modern Cosmology" by Sirs Todd Duncan and Craig Tyler is one of the most entertaining textbooks I have encountered in quite some time. This might be due to the fact that it was really late last night, the construction was blaring at its usual noise level, and I was kind of delirious, but there are so many little tidbits stuck in parentheses throughout that are straight up hilarious. They are things I think in my head and laugh to myself about, but are never actually written. It was great! Naturally, I was laughing out loud. RM was questioning my sanity, buuut it's alright. When is someone not questioning my sanity these days?

A couple prime examples for your enjoyment:

"If you had all-encompassing power over the world, and you wanted to quadruple the gravity force felt by the rest of us lowly earthlings, just to amuse yourself, how would you do it?"

"The idea of being bound is simple. It means that, without acquiring some additional energy, you can't escape. Without additional energy provided by a large rocket engine, your body is bound to Earth. (Of course, your mind can go higher by studying cosmology.)"

Invisible en Espanol

Today my spanish professor stopped me in the middle of some sort of human bingo game (AKA get out of your chair and talk to other people in the class in spanish) and asked if I was new. I clearly had a very confused expression on my face and accidentally threw out a "What?!" (as opposed to a "¡¿Que?!") and she repeated the question, and I replied with a "No." She goes "Oh this is the first time I've seen you in my class! What's your name?" I managed to blurt out "Andrea" accompanied by half a chortle, and then moved back to my seat.

Let's review. I have been in class every single day (allll five of them), I have made eye contact with this woman every single day when she takes attendance, I have raised my hand and answered multiple questions on various days, annnd NO, I am NOT new.

I guess I'm just a little more ordinary looking than I thought. Who knew it was so easy to fade into the white cinderblock wall?

School. Is. Back?

It's about time I update this...it seems like it has been a long time, even if it has only been a whopping four days. Classes have begun, and have taken over life! As most people know, the first week of class is just straight horrible. It's syllabus upon syllabus, technicality upon technicality, ice breakers that don't actually do a thing to break the ice and sometimes just make things even more frosty, and occasionally a realization that you must get out of a certain class (ahem, complex systems). Onward and upward!

We finally started taking some legit notes in Women's Studies (Perspectives in Women's Health, mind you) which was highly exciting (yes, I'm aware of how high a caliber of nerd I am)...annnd yeah. That's about it for real stuff that has happened...IN class. Outside of class there is already a boatload of reading and homework and whew! Everything all over the place! Skyline is a pretty large time suck, but I'm thoroughly enjoying it. Get my little volleyball fix (which isn't exactly little) and I am thrilled to get a chance to hop in for a drill every now and then. Little do they know, my life happiness increases by several percentage points when they let me do anything remotely close to playing!

In other news, the construction across the street is still insanely loud. Imagine loud construction for a moment. Now, amplify that sound by about six. There ya have it. Among the yelling men, clanging on metal structures, sawing, beeping (from trucks in reverse mode), smashing concrete, dumping concrete into a metal dump truck, driving around backhoes and bulldozers, and the general traffic noise I am awoken every morning prior to 8 a.m. At the moment I wake up, I typically peel back the beautiful curtains (a Maj Original Creation), flick off the construction workers, let out a grunt and general sounds of angst, and then roll over. I am then kept awake (slash sleep in two minute intervals) until I actually need to get up. Not the greatest.

My master plan for tomorrow is to wake up, march across the street (in my pink reindeer pajama shorts, Melvin the teddy bear under my arm), knock on Sir Construction Worker's hard hat, and inquire as to when they will be complete with their large scale arts and crafts project that seems to be producing an obscene amount of noise. The likelihood that this will actually occur? Very slim. But, there is a chance. There is always a chance. (Especially if I wake up to that stupid backhoe slamming into the concrete ground over and over and over again....on another occasion. Then, someone is going to be wishing they hadn't become a construction worker...)

An Awesome Elevator Exchange

I traveled over to South Quad last night to visit my roommate from last year, the lovely YZ, and had a bit of an issue with entering the elevator. No big deal, just typical Andrea behavior, but slightly embarrassing. Not that embarrassing really gets to me, considering I am actually a walking embarrassment to myself since I am highly uncoordinated and tend to make comments to people I don't even know...yikes. Maybe I should work on that...

Anyways. So we're on the first floor attempting to get up to the sixth floor. The elevator bings open and two dudes get in, then the doors start to close when YZ goes in (but opens again), and then I followed after her, but the doors had already started to close again causing me to slam into the one, yell out an 'Ow!' and then realize that there were other people in the elevator. So this was followed up by a thorough explanation of how I am secretly terrified of the doors closing on me and then the elevator actually still moving while I'm stuck in the doors, etc. etc. Boy #1 then commented on what a coordinated move I had just made, so I had to reply with yet another explanation of how I'm not coordinated on land...and that it makes life a bit difficult. Hahahahaha oh my goodness. Thank god the elevators move quickly in SQuad and that I can babble on and on and on and on...I officially talked through the entire ride about ridiculous things that no one else really needs to know about...and continued it on the way out of the elevator. It was a really great thing that they didn't get off on the same floor as we did...

The upside is that one of the boys, Boy #1, thought I was funny and chuckled the whole way up...the other one, mmm not so much. He seemed to be rather terrified and gave me the "Why Is This Crazy Chick Not Taking Her Meds?" Look. Oops! Sorry sir! Didn't mean to frighten...I just feel the need to verbalize things...and I absolutely hate those awkward silent rides in elevators. If I'm going to share oxygen with multiple people in a very small space, it's fun to at least have a semi-comical exchange, or at least a friendly one. Then again, I'm pretty sure I've been intimidated by some outrageous people on the elevator in my day, so who's to say I've never pulled the Boy #2 Look? Hard to say.

Hard. To. Say.

The Things One Can Learn At the Post Office

After a lovely trip to my favorite government building the other day, I realized what an enlightening trip it really was. Who knew that shipping a book that I sold on Amazon would provide me with such a grand learning experience? I sure wasn't expecting it!

First lesson learned: I am too nice when out in public.

• I landed in line behind this old woman, who struck up conversation about the renovations and how long they had been going on (since she had been out of town all summer), which was fine. Who doesn't love a little friendly stranger-to-stranger small talk while in the slowest moving line ever? Anyways, then she started grumbling about how she had this meeting to get to across town and how she didn't know if she was going to make it there on time...blah blah blah. After a few ahh's and mmm's from me, the crazy lady (who should not be paid) and who walks up and down the line telling people to go use the APC (Automated Postage Center) appeared to help this woman figure out what type of packaging should be used. It wouldn't fit in the smallest of the flat rate boxes, so they tried a flat rate envelope, but then this woman decided she wanted the padded version of the envelope and went and got that one. Now, this padded envelope was $1.59, the whole postage part is not included in the envelope fee...old lady McGeezer didn't understand this. She turned to me and asked if I wouldn't mind buying the envelope for her because she needed to get to her meeting. I said that wouldn't be a problem figuring she would just give me some money for both the envelope and the postage. No no, she just gave me two bucks and then turned to leave...without sealing the envelope, without putting an address on it, nothing. So I inquired as to whether or not she was going to put the address on the envelope and she exclaimed "Oh! You're going to mail it for me?!" Well DUH lady. Do you think I'm just going to purchase the envelope and then what? Leave it on the counter for you to find later? I'm not really sure...she clearly was not fully there. Anyways. She was sending it to Leland, so that was an up...and she was old...so I paid the three dollars to ship it. Ugh it kills me when I'm a decent human being. Hahahaha

Second lesson learned (err rather more like a realization of sorts): Pocket placement on very very large pants.

• So after this old woman peaced from the post office I ended up behind a very, very large dude. As in, if I were to hug him, my hands would be nowhere near touching around his back. ANYWAYS, considering I had plenty of time to observe all that was around me in such a thrilling atmosphere, I started studying the man's pants in front of me. I saw that the pockets were wayyyy off center, but still tiny. Not placed on the center of the butt cheek, but rather more on the hip/thigh region. I got to thinking and I finally figured it out. Of course, normal people use their back pockets, and therefore need access to them...so if they were smack in the middle of the butt cheek, the arm would not be able to reach the pocket! My lovely realization was confirmed about fifteen minutes later when he had to pull his wallet out of his back pocket for a form of picture i.d. Needless to say I was pretty pleased that I had that figured out before the action actually took place.

Those were really the only things of value that came out of that trip to the post office. At least I left with something though...fun facts and out of three dollars for being a nice human. Oof.

A Partay For the Bride-To-Be

The over-friendly takeover by mass amounts of estrogen has ceased. In other words...the Bridal Shower held at our household is over and for the most part cleaned up...only four hours post-start time. Pretty decent I would say, but then again I have no idea how long these things are supposed to last.

It was a great success if I do say so myself. After the Maj had been baking mini muffins and cupcakes (and sending me to every store in town looking for the mix) for days in advance, creating pasta salads and salad of the fruit variety, and working on the cookbook party favors how could things not go smoothly? We only forgot one person...and their name tag...and a place setting or two...and a couple people's recipes in the book. No big dealll. Everything went smoothly.

The large assortment of beverages available included wine, lemonade, iced tea, and the largest container with a spout filled with water and lemons that you've probably ever seen. We're talking a container on the roids. I had the lovely job of filling that puppy up with water...and then with enough ice to construct the iceberg that sunk the Titanic...

For the lunch part (otherwise known as my favorite part), we had a chicken pesto pasta salad that was an extreme shade of green and 110% delicious, a fruit salad that could have fed a family of giants, broccoli salad (I'm not sure why it was called this...it was coleslaw-esque with random nuts [including some nut that was in the same family as the pumpkin seed?] and a bunch of crunchy things...), and cold potato leek soup complete with a lot of cream making it pretty darn scrumptious. So the food spread was pretty beautimous. Then we had three different types of mini muffins...banana nut, blueberry (more commonly referred to as 'bluebs'), and my favorite lemon poppyseed. Onward to the desserts! Coconut cupcakes (which contained more butter than you would ever want to be aware of), lemon squares, some mint chocolate things, and cool chocolates that were molded into fun shapes (like hearts and high heels and hats...pretty great).

I was assigned the job of 'Scribe' for the gift opening sector of the event. This meant that I had to squeeze myself into the small space on the floor behind Amanda's chair, half guess people's names, and come up with crafty ways of wording gifts. Don't worry, the list ended up with four different colors on it and didn't include a single scratch out! I wrote down things such as 'cheese tools,' 'pizza basket filled with miscellaneous pizza items,' and other such helpful descriptors. Hopefully she knows what I meant...

All in all, twas a grand affair! Well done Maj and Aunt Karen, congratulations Amanda and Ben, annnd thank you to everyone who came!

*I'm not entirely sure what the deal is with the font on this post, but yes, it's really bothering me that I cannot get it to match the rest of the blog!

Oh, Sorry I Was Busy Disguising DIRT in the WOODS

Oops. Sorry for the neglection of the blog...I've been rather busy for once! What a concept! I have started volunteering for Skyline Volleyball and it's a pretty big time suck believe it or not. Those three hour practices really take away from my solitaire playing...it's a bit sad, but not really. I feel way more productive, way better about myself, and I'm actually kind of getting in shape...kind of. Not really. Since I don't really practice with them...but the whole standing and walking around for three hours chucking balls and such takes a lot out of me! Whew.

Anyhoo. A couple of weeks ago, as I think I previously posted, we started building (and by we I mean not me at all...the Brain and Cousin T) a patio out the door from the basement. Naturally, a lot of digging had to occur in order to make it both level and even with the rest of the grassy area out back, and all of that dirt had to go somewhere. Conveniently enough, we live right by the woods (and of course we would pitch it all back there, I saw it as a little contribution to the nature landscape...eh? Maybe? Mmm not to the Faj...). ANYWAYS, Faj didn't love the two or three hilly mounds the dirt clods created and therefore sent me and the Brain to disguise them.

Yes. Disguise dirt. In. The. Woods.

Totally fine. Turns out...pine needles are excellent for covering up unnatural-looking (yet, natural) materials. The dead leaves and halfway composted materials are not so great...they tend to fly in various directions when tossed atop a dirt clod pile, oftentimes ending up all over the tosser. Not ideal. It also rings true that mosquitoes still love me because even though I practically took a shower in deet, I still emerged with a rather high number of new bites. Hey-zeus.

A minor re-cap of yesterday's festivities includes (but is not limited to) the awkward man at Border's, a power chair race down Liberty, one crazy lady at Arbor Farms, and an elephant-esque outfit:

1. Border's Man - This man served as both the greeter (probably not the best position for him) and as the cashier (also not great...I'm thinking a stock-man would be fitting). So, I walk in and make eye contact because usually those are the people who try and suck you into some deal, or hand you a coupon (WOO!), or at least offer up a Howdy of sorts...but after a pretty decent amount of time nothing was said, so I dropped eye contact, and then looked at him again a split second later just to check that he was still conscious. Conscious he was! At 1:30 p.m. he finally puttered out a rather theatrical "Good morning" (complete with a stutter) followed up by a large fumble of words, a slight chuckle, and a "Oh umm, I, I, I mean good afternoon. Ha. Ha." Holy muffin tins. At the check out counter I figured it would be pretty painless...and I mean it was, minus the numerous stutters, multiple attempts at getting me to sign up for the Border's Rewards Card (it's free!), and awkward broken up conversation attempt. Yikes.
2. Power Chair Race Down Liberty - Naturally I have no idea if these two women were racing, but I would very much like to think that they were. I zoomed by in the Loser Cruiser and nearly started announcing the play by play (but decided against it, don't worry). Identical chairs, one right behind the other, just flying along the sidewalk. Now that might be one of the only perks of a power chair. The ability to race others in similar makes and models...
3. Crazy Lady at Arbor Farms - While on a mad hunt for the Barefoot Contessa Coconut Cupcake Mix (for the Maj...) I stopped in at Arbor Farms. As I was walking in, a few people were walking out and among them was a curly gray haired woman talking about some protest. She then proceeded to screech to the innocent woman also trying to exit the establishment..."Heyyyy beautiful woman. Beautiful wo-o-o-o-o-o-mannnnn!" The last thing I heard before I was safely inside the sliding glass doors was a fed up "Yeah?" Hahahaha. The thing is that I thought there might actually be something wrong with this woman and so the behavior might be excusable...but when I left (without the cupcake mix mind you) she was driving a vehicle and so I assumed she potentially was not a few cookies short of a dozen. On the real though, large navy blue kidnapper van. Watch out, folks (especially all you beautiful women out there).
4. The Elephant-esque Outfit - This really wasn't that exciting. I had on a gray skirt...and after dancing outside in the rain with the rest of the Three Musketeers I plopped on a dry gray sweatshirt...elephant behavior followed shortly after. No big deal...

Polish Party For Two

There was a wedding in the neighborhood this past weekend, and I was called on board to babysit the Polish baby. I believe it was the groom's brother's child? I couldn't tell you and be 100% certain, but you know, that's close enough in my book. He was referred to as 'Baby X' due to the fact that us A-murr-i-cans can't pronounce the Polish form of Xavier. Heck, I can barely pronounce the English form of it!

Anyways. I was called to the front lines as soon as Baby X drifted off to dreamland and commenced the most difficult babysitting job of all time. I had to sit on the couch and watch terrible Saturday night television for four and a half hours. Whew! I barely made it out of there alive! Anyhoozles. I just checked on him every half an hour or so, flipped him on his side at one point when there were cries of uncomfortableness, and yeah, all went smoothly!

Well, all but the whole DVD player thing. Geez. So the DVD is supposed to go into the slot that's on the side of the TV set, but there was already one in there. So of course I checked around the slot for a button (no luck), then I searched the remote (no luck), and then I gave up for a little bit. I then got a little frustrated and started looking all over. I combed over the front of the TV, the bottom, the sides, I tried to lift a mystery compartment, no luck in any of these places! Then, like the short idiot I am, I realized that I hadn't checked the top (because why would the buttons be on the top of the TV? I'm not sure) but lo and behold, there it was! That beautiful triangle with a line underneath it. The shiny silver eject button. Mmm!

So I press it. Some noises occur, with zero result. I thought to myself 'Well that's weird...' and then pushed it again. Same outcome. Irritating. After several more tries, I gave up and went back to TV land. Not the channel, just the world of television. Watched Practical Magic (the one about witches with Sandra Bullock in it...based on that Alice Hoffman book...pretty great and terrible at the same time, ya know), That 70s Show, The King of Queens, and a couple episodes of Sex and the City (BOTH of which I had already seen...and that's ODD because I don't often watch that show. I highly dislike Sarah Jessica Parker for some reason...don't ask).

Naturally every time I got up to check on Baby X, I crossed my fingers and pressed the defective button...and every time, I just got more irritated. Poor cycle. Poor, poor cycle. Oh well. All in all, a pretty wonderful evening.

Obesity Takes Skeletor

After a hard day of work for the Brain and Cousin T, we headed out to Coney Island for a not so nutritious dinner. Everyone knows that it's pretty difficult to get any nutritional value out of a meal at this place, but there is a way to dodge an instant heart attack. Brain, otherwise known as Skeletor went straight for it. He ordered the Monster Burger. Three 1/3 pound patties, with a slice of American cheese in between each, plus mayo, ketchup, onions, lettuce, and tomato.

Holy GOD. And on top of that...he wanted chili cheese fries!! I went ahead and vetoed the chili cheese fries, so we could make it home without being gassed out of the vehicle...slash so he wasn't guaranteed to fall on the floor and die instantly within minutes of finishing. Yikes.

When this steroidal burger emerged from the kitchen I was amazed. It was much too large for my mouth, but it's a good thing the Brain can just go ahead and unhinge his jaw and squeeze it in his piehole. Dripping in grease (naturally) with a large side of fries and a mini tub of mayo he went ahead and demolished the Monster Burger in its entirety...not really to our amazement, but I'm pretty sure he received a few incredulous stares from those that had seen what once was sitting atop his plate.

Anyways...we rolled the boy who amazingly didn't appear to have a food baby on board out of the restaurant and headed to Lowe's for part two of the adventure.

Now, why we took the Civic, the smallest car in our army of vehicular devices, I'm not sure. Lapse in thought perhaps, but anyways. We needed to pick up two ten foot sections of PVC piping and somehow transport it in this tiny compact automobile. We ended up putting one end in the front passenger seat and stuck the other end out of the back left passenger seat's window...and yes, there was probably three-ish feet extra jutting out the left side of the car...eek.

The Brain and Cousin T plopped themselves in the back seat and I assumed the Chauffeur position (one that I am fairly familiar with, after all, it is my summer job). We hugged the right side of the road for the entire drive back to the home unit and received plenty of stares, funny looks, laughs, a number of double takes, and even an enthusiastic thumbs up! Needless to say, it was a pleasantly entertaining ride home.

Thermal Cameras and Orthodontia

I took JR to the orthodontist today...to figure out the date the train tracks would be removed and for a general tightening. Oh what fun...how I miss those days...

Anyways, I plopped down on the couch and took out my book ready to get some quality pages in from The Time Traveler's Wife (since the book had been missing for several days and I'd been anxious to read it again). JR came out en route to brush and floss (Orthodontist's orders) when all of a sudden this man on the other side of the room starts making whining noises. Obviously I looked up to see where this noise was coming from and WHY. Turns out, the grown father of a fifteen year old twin (yes, I was informed of this fact a bit later) was the one creating the whiny noise. Then, since he already had my attention and all he decided to start talking about how dentists are the ones who clean the teeth and that orthodontists will have nothing to do with that (thank you sir, I'm actually an idiot and I don't already know this. I was born with the genes to have perfect teeth and therefore did not have to go through an awkward braces-filled stage complete with countless orthodontist visits. I also don't still have to go in every six months...). It reminded him of when he used to work in the factory for some car company...I think it was GM, not sure, and how grown men would complain about being tired etc., etc., etc. The whining noises continued and it took every ounce of energy I had not to just crack up. Wow. After that I was asked if JR was my little sister, which I politely explained that she wasn't, and that she was my summer job (all the while trying to make it clear that I was attempting to read the book that was open in my lap).

Then he figured out that I was a student (NO WAY!) and asked if I went to Eastern...? Why? I'm not sure...perhaps it's his go-to institution of higher education? I don't know. I then explained that I was a Wolverine. No, I didn't really know what I was studying. No, I'm not interested in anything technological. Yes, I went to Pioneer. Yes we do have a larger student body than Saline does. No I didn't play an instrument in the band, but congratulations to your kids. Yes, I was interested in art. Interesting that his son worked at the art building down the street. Oh, thank you for the tips not to get into debt and to manage my money...it continued...

After an awkward pause, during which I got to read half of a page of text all the while feeling this dude's eyes boring a hole in my forehead, he stands up, hands me the binder he has been flipping through for the past twelve minutes, and comes and sits down right next to me. At this point I put away my book and gave up any lingering sense of hope that I might enjoy this trip to the orthodontist's office and started wholeheartedly wishing for JR to emerge. Soon.

I started looking through the binder, and here began the lesson on thermal cameras, infrared technology, fuse boxes, pulleys, gears, and the Redford Public School System. The whole infrared camera business was pretty interesting...I learned that you can calibrate one of these cameras to find temperature differences within 1/10 of a degree and that they can be used on humans to find where circulation problems are occurring and something that has to do with cancer. Cool, right?!

But his line of work had to do with electronic equipment and so I was lectured about how a fuse box works, what the problem was, how he created his own color scale for the thermal picture (complete with a very clear breakpoint! Pink to purple...), how the pulley worked, how much of a problem grease is, that grease creates a layer that electrons must travel through as opposed to direct contact which is much more efficient and won't lead to premature failure, oh and the list goes on. I could tell you all about the temperature differences and all the repairs this special man with the whitehead zit on his nose informed me of for probably the twenty minutes of it that I got to sit through.

Also, in case you were wondering, this particular school was right off of I-96 (I think...) and in the front was a service road that only went one way so that would explain why all of the parking lots are in the back and to the side because people probably enter from the side road...blah blah blee dee blah blah blah. Thank goodness for Google Earth because this man did not have to take a picture of the front of the building, because what a challenge that would be.

During this time, Mr. Tattoos and Piercings entered the room and was forced to eavesdrop on our tantalizing conversation. I attempted to make eye contact just in case we were maybe suffering together. I received no such thing, there had to be something extremely interesting on the floor. I tried to reach out to In and Out Mom as well, who entered and exited a ridiculous amount of times, but all I got was a smile of pity and then she got to return to her book. Oy. The receptionist even came in and shot my one of those half smiles that say something like "Wow, I'm really sorry you have to sit through this, but I don't want to deal with him so good luck." Yikes.

Thank goodness JR emerged shortly after the parking lot explanation, complete with a million rubber bands essentially clamping her mouth closed. Not great. But at least I was saved from Sir Thermal Camera and Father of Twins.

Now, to those who live with me, they claim me as utterly incapable of tolerance of other people. I do believe this story: a) disproves that statement, and b) explains why I can't always deal with the Gregorka Zoo since I encounter strange people like this on a daily basis. Besides, they're kind of stuck with me...sorry guys! :)

Fumbled Onions

I took a trip to the greatest car service restaurant I have found yet with AP the other day (if you aren't sure, I'm referring to A&W). I figured it would be one more thing to knock off the Summer To-Do List and a delicious second lunch at the same time! Can't get much better than that!

We decided to forgo the car service and plopped at a picnic table since it was rather glorious outside. After being attacked by a fly (with many hits to the eyeball) pale me being...well, pale, started to worry about the giant ball of gas's rays, but since we were only eating lunch I didn't really think it would be a problem. I went with the bacon cheeseburger combo complete with fries and a large mug of rootbeer while my comrade went for the footlong hot dog of glory, complete with onions. Now, those things aren't the easiest things to control. The amount of toppings put together with the extreme length of the thing cause a bit of a mess at times. Hence, fumbled onions. A few diced onion chunks took a leap of faith and lost...hitting the table and rolling off onto the ground (or being flicked off) for some lucky creature to enjoy later (and for its friends to enjoy on its breath!).

So, after an afternoon of feeling extremely large, one more thing could be checked off my list. Ahh what a great feeling.

Later I discovered that I had a pink nose and cheeks. Funny how a half an hour in the sun caused that...clearly I need to start getting my tan on. Eek.

Gotta Love Me Some Leland

Allllright I apologize for the slight blip in bloggage. I got really motivated, and then all of a sudden I got really lazy...

But anyways. The first thing that happened while I was gone was a little weekend getaway to the lovely Leland, Michigan. It's just gosh darn adorable up there...and so many places to obtain ice cream (just one of those added bonuses). We had a bit of rain most days, but the one that counted was clear until nighttime.

Manitou Island. Slightly nightmarish. The hour and a half ferry ride out there was slightly uneventful...well except for the "Got Jesus?" girls. A whole gaggle of them wearing "Got Jesus?" apparel. Sadly I only managed to snap a halfway decent shot while making it very clear that I was being creepy and continually making awkward eye contact. Eek. Totally fine. Who knew they even made that stuff? I mean, I own a "Got TCF?" t-shirt, but that's for promotional purposes. It's almost as if they're attempting to advertise good ol' Hey-zeus.

Made it to land without sinking, ate some Cheese Shanty sandwiches (so delicious...pretzel bread, great invention), Maj tied her towel skirt around her waist, and off we went to find various cool things around the island. First stop, shipwreck number one. Otherwise known as a plaque with information and an orange stake sticking out of the water...not great. Onward to the giant cedars! Along the way we made friends with various toads, snakes, and also the Whacker Family.

The Whacker Family consisted of a father and his two sons. Each with a decent sized stick in hand, literally whacking every single tree they passed. This included but was not limited to:

• all fungus
• any living tree
• any dead tree (these were even better because the Whackers had the opportunity to fling broken tree debris in all directions)
• and more than likely, any animal

Now, it would be a little bit more understandable had Son One and Son Two been responsible for all of the nature beating, but Poppa Whacker was right there with 'em! Incredible.

After a couple more miles we found the cedars. I'd rate them good not great. I guess they're the oldest in the world? Which is cool. But there aren't very many and they're all mixed in with the other tree folk making it hard to actually see them and their scraggly branches. If that makes sense. After taking a family photo via the timer function on the Maj's camera (and attempting to set it on a giant mossy fallen tree) we found our way back to the main drag and headed for the dunes!

After a rather large and very steep upward climb, we realized that there were many more dunes to scale before we could actually see the shoreline. When we reached the edge...we discovered a sort of sand cliff. 400 feet nearly straight down...with some large rocks all embedded in there. Naturally, we went down it. If you just dug your heels in and kept moving it wasn't so bad...in the beginning I got a large load of sand stuck in my shorts, but after that it was alright. We reached the bottom and started hightailing it around the island. After all, we only had two hours to get back to the boat before it left...

We ended up having to put our tennis shoes back on because of the terrible rocky shore in spots...which was alright for awhile, until we reached the horrible lagoon of algae. This was one of those spots where the water came all the way up to the edge of the forest and was about a foot deep...complete with buckets full of algae. Needless to say we exited the swamp area with a few souvenirs otherwise known as chunks of slime threaded through our shoelaces and slapped on the back of our calves. Gross.

Eventually Brain and I split off from the group to go a little faster and hopefully be able to hold up the boat if we had to. The parentals disappeared from view after awhile and the Brain and I just kept crossing our fingers that we would be able to see the lighthouse from the next bend we rounded. It took a lot, a lot, of bends before we saw the shining white lighthouse of relief. At that point we deemed it safe to dive in the lake and cool off for a wee bit. The Brain failed to realize that lighthouse tours were under way and may have flashed a bit of a full moon to the younger children up top, but oh well!

A reunion with the parents, shoes filled with sand, very sweaty, and extremely tired...we boarded the boat and watched the rain clouds close in during our two hour ride back. Correction: Our two hour extremely rocky ride back. It only really ended up sprinkling for a little bit, but I was very pleased to be back on land after that ride! Yikes!

I'd say the next thing worth reporting is the dredger. I guess we chose the exact wrong weekend to go to Leland because the wondrous beach that should have been perfection was converted into a construction site complete with a yellow John Deere bulldozer and a giant floating (extremely loud) work site contraption with a ridiculous amount of pipes. At least the sunset was still pretty...even if it was framed by various construction equipment.

Dinner one night was had at the good ol' Leland Lodge. Our waiter...a male with longish very curly hair (held back by a headband) was instructed by the Maj to give us "a lot of time" because we "weren't in a hurry." We weren't in a hurry, but this dude's concept of "a lot of time" was truly a lot of time. We probably sat there for a good half hour or so waiting for his return. More than likely he was playing with his hair in front of the mirror in the little boys' room, but it's really anyone's guess.

The following night we dined at North. Some fancy pants place where we clearly didn't fit in a little ways down M-22. The hostess was outfitted in bright teal tights and a multicolored neon dress with flower print and very chipper. Our waiter...Mark...was a mature older man, one that we thought would have the whole waiting on people thing down pat since he more than likely had a little experience, and yeah, he was well spoken, but we only saw him a grand total of mmmm I'd say three times? Thrice, if you will. We kind of figured out that the older gentlemen waiters were probably the front men, and then all the younger people were actually in charge of doing the real work. Who knows. Super awkward for sure. Brain had his watch timer going to see how long it took him to come back to the table, we went for a whole meal without a beverage, and pretty much just talked about Mark the entire meal. Oh well. Dessert was delicious. Warm chocolate cake, more like a giant Reeses's peanut butter cup in cake form. HOLY moly. So good. We exited on a positive note for sure.

The Leland Lodge was pretty great. Brain and I got the bunks that folded out of the wall while Maj and Faj shacked up in the gigantic king sized bed that took up the rest of the room. Needless to say we were a little short on space. It blows my mind how every hotel room smells the same (well, except for the ones in China). It's as if there is some rule as to which laundry detergent hotels can use. So weird. Hopefully it's at the top of the disinfecting line. Anyhoo, we altered the industrial smell of that room right quick thanks to Faj and Brain. Ay yi yi. Out of hand a little bit...

Well. I think that about covers the highlights of the trip, but there's no saying I won't update with random tidbits if I think of them. Hahaha. :)

Winter, Spring, Summer, Construction...

Ann Arbor construction season is straight up killer. Over yonder in Ypsitucky, otherwise known as Ypsilanti, there are more orange objects taking over the road than one can shake a stick at. It's plenty irritating. I decided to take a wee little trip to Old Navy after depositing my charge at Eastern for swim practice just to fill the time, and boy did it. At least the drive there and back did. In normal conditions, I'm thinking that drive would take less than five minutes. But since it was 1:00 and the season of construction...it took around twenty. Yaaay!

After many a forced lane change on the way there I figured I'd be able to get back alright since it didn't look nearly as painful. Have no fear, I was wrong. It took just as long to get back to my Senior Center Recreation Park as it did to arrive at my shopping expedition. So great. It's alright...killed some time and at least I was in the Civic Hybrid and not just burning fossil fuels by the second. So handy!

Anyways...today my luck in the board game sector of life went through the roof and I killed my opponent in multiple games of Trouble, Harry Potter Clue, and the grand ol' game of Life. Beautimous. The sad thing is that I legitimately (and secretly) get really upset when I lose...even if it's a stupid board game, and yesterday was a terrible day in Andrea's Board Game Land...I left with zero victories. At least today made up for that!

Now, a message to the sky. Can you please just unleash your fury with a solid thunderstorm? I've had enough of the stupid little three second spurts of eighteen raindrops and random dark overtakings of the sky. Great, thanks.

Update On The Skinhead Cardinals

Thank you to Poppa Joel for a rather informative Facebook message about bald cardinals...sometimes I wonder if you get anything done at work...hahaha just kidding! But really...

Anyways. Apparently no one really knows why these bald birdies are in flight about the area, but that most likely they are amateurs at molting and accidentally lose all their head feathers in the process...either that, or a form of head lice (apparently head lice don't discriminate...they will attack anything with something atop its head), or I'm just going to throw this possibility out there...perhaps the poor things are just plain stressed. I hear that leads to hair slash feather loss...fuzz loss?

But anyways...he didn't come hopping about the bird feeder when I was watching today, maybe tomorrow. We shall see. We. Shall. See...

In other news...round two of oral surgery hopefully went well. Had that lovely trip last Wednesday morning with a very jolly twin brother alongside as my form of transportation. The office was locked when we got there because the person with the keys was late, then I sat in the room with the giant paper sheet draped over me for a solid hour waiting for the doctor to get there because he was stuck in some meeting, and then the drugs set in and all was just fine and dandy! Apparently I got my favorite nurse, made a few phone calls that I didn't quite remember, and asked a lot of the same questions....over and over and over and over....hehe oops.

Anyways. Now there's just a rather large ball of twine in the back of my mouth...meaning a buttload of stitches and a kind of gross looking area. If you would like to take a look I'd be more than happy to fulfill your request...it's kind of cool if you ask me. I'm taking really cool bright blue antibiotics, sleeping a lot, and working on fixing stomach issues. Neat-o gang. We get to go back to that joyous office in about a week! Can I get a 'Hip! Hip! Hooray!'?

Cardinal....Cancer?

We have a bald cardinal.

Or at least it feeds at our blue feeder that hangs off the back porch.

I kid you not, it is bald. It has zero feathers atop its fairly ugly head which is graced with the presence of black skin.

We saw one of these at the Schielke's on the Fourth of July...although theirs was a little mangier looking, so I'm gonna go ahead and hypothesize that there is a virus going around the cardinal population.

And by virus I mean terminal illness. If one loses the feathers atop its head, I'm gonna go ahead and assume the end is near. They can SEE the light at the end of the tunnel and are heading towards it.

Hope they led a grand life in bird world.

Hats off to you, Cardinals of the Eberwhite Woods and surrounding Ann Arbor area...err feathers off to you...

A Camptastic Adventure To Go Down In History

We decided to go camping, because who doesn't love a good weekend camping trip right? After some minor planning, we got our shiz together to get on the road and to the Up North region of the Mitten. We headed up in two groups...the first group didn't have to work or hang out with their grandma, so they were in Wilderness by approximately 3 p.m. We three, on the other hand, had to work slash hang out with grandma, and so we didn't peace from the booming metropolis of Ann Arbor until about 5...an hour later we got off at the Lee Road exit (in Brighton) for some sustenance of the Panera kind...only to re-enter the highway scene with a few less cars than before, but still a slow moving mass of metal. Anyhoo...onward march! After escaping that traffic nightmare, we ran into the second one. Someone had to have died on this highway because they had it completely closed it off and were re-routing traffic...so that was another thing to rejoice about. Then we received a call from one Poppa Joel alerting SWG that she might have left all of her clothes at home...typical. Yet, hilarious! All we needed was a little bit of cooperation and she would make it through the weekend juuust fine.

Anyways. After seven hours of travel we were approaching our destination in the pouring rain and raging thunderstorm, when a porcupine comes waddling out of nowhere causing all of us to start screaming. Who knew how awkward porcupines were when they walked? I guess all those needles tend to get in the way and all, but gee whiz, you would think they would have thought of a better way to get around by now, after all these years.

Ummm then we stopped at the check-in station, which was clearly empty due to the fact that it was midnight 'o' clock, had an encounter with one of the park people who drove up with a flashlight asking questions, and then finally got to our campsite. Whew!

Night #1 was tres interasante. A lot of rain in a little amount of time equals not great. We ended up with some flooding inside the tent that was the size of a small house (and bigger than my dorm room). First it was just the little tiny hole that was forming a little puddle over by someone's head, but then it started seeping up through the entire bottom of the tent due to the fact that we were actually floating on a quite a bit of water, it was inevitable. A few got up and went to sleep in the car, and a few of us braved it...considering I was only wet from my waist down, I decided to stick it out. It wasn't terrible...at least it wasn't freezing cold on top of the wetness factor! When the rain finally slowed down, we decided to check out the area...some stakes had come loose, the awning was ripped, there was a LOT of water all around, and the tent was leaning rather severely in one direction...KK and I made some necessary adjustments and then we all just attempted a bit of slumber.

In the morning...the entire place was a little sad and tired looking...it had gone through quite a beating in just one short night, but the sun was coming out and there was quite a breeze. AKA primo condition to dry anything and everything out. Checked out the beach area, watched SW strip all sticks in sight of their bark, ate some delicious cereal, and then peaced to find a public beach with a little more sand and a little less beach grass. We landed on one with a very secret driveway and set up camp. KK, SWG (whose swim suit ended up being a pair of undies and a sports bra), and I frolicked about in the waves because the water was rather warm, but sadly, no one else would join us! Harumph. I guess they were too busy in iPod land to come play in the waves. Whoooo knows. Umm wave frolicking was followed up by a dandy lunch of PB&J sandwiches, Sun Chips, and various other items. Deeericious. Then we decided to go back to the campsite, start a fire, and commence the eating fest of all eating fests.

I took up the post of Professional Weenie Warmer and prepared the hot dogs to what I would say was perfection. Heated all the way through, but not completely singed on the outside. I'd say that was pretty successful. Let's see, the weenies were followed up by some grilled cheeses, followed up by chips, lots of pop, carrots and dip, fruit, homemade pretzels (SO GOOD), s'mores, and probably some more weenies. Hahahaha. Kind of disgusting...but it was totally fine. I claimed it vacation, which meant I was going to eat whatever I wanted...although when has not being on vacation stopped me from eating whatever I wanted to eat? Yeah I don't know...makes me feel better about myself!

After a long while of lounging about the campfire, with a nap in the middle, KK, SWG, and I decided to go to the beach to watch the sunset slash enjoy the lake atmosphere. We had quite the photo shoot and the sunset ended up lasting forever and was rather amazing, so needless to say, we were pleased with our decided plan of action.

When the cold night began to set in, we started to prepare for the Skinny Dipping Adventure of 2009. Clearly I only had the honor to be accompanied by KK and SWG, the others weren't feeling the nighttime lake quest. We suited up...well, rather down...but headed out with the 2 in 1 poo and dish, a towel, and a sweatshirt...oh and the really sweet flashlights compliments of Poppa Bob and Momma Annette...complete with wristbands so it's hard to lose them! We set up our base at the shore, dropped trow, and ran for it. Slightly chilly, but all in all, not terrible! A rejuvenating blast of cold I would say...and we got to wash our hair...which was a sweet added bonus.

After heading back to camp, we attempted to dry ourselves off as best as we could, and then put on every layer of clothing we brought and hunkered down in our sleeping bags to brave the cold night. Brr! In the morning, after waking up with all limbs still intact, our neighbors (the friendliest Indianers [oof...what do you call someone from Indiana?] on the planet offered us a delicious pot of coffee (which we graciously accepted) and took a couple snapshots of the entire group. So great. The first half of el grupo peaced to go back to Ann Arbor while KK, SWG, and I disassembled the house tent and packed up the Suburban.

After leaving Wilderness we decided that we should probably cross the Mackinac Bridge and prance about the Upper Peninsula...so that is just what we did! We climbed Castle Rock for a great view, walked about St. Ignace and grabbed a pretty good lunch, attempted to go see Tahquamenon Falls...but they were really far away so that failed, and basically just explored and had fun doing it! Naturally we were followed by hockey wherever we went....with the USA Hockey supporter sticker on the car we parked next to and then the St. Ignace Saints Hockey stickers that were plastered EVERYWHERE. Who knows. WHO knows.

But yes, that was our glorious day, and then we headed back to Ann Arbor. Believe it or not we arrived home after four hours instead of seven! Huh! Who knew it was humanly possible. Granted we did leave the tent stakes at the campsite...oopsie daisy...but they called and were really quite great about it. Last I heard they were sending them via snail mail back to the wonderful Ace Deuce region.

So yes, that was that. A little late in the reporting of events, but I've been busy...playing WorldofSolitaire. Eeeek I just said that.

Thumbs Up To Greatness

My life has officially been taken over by WorldOfSolitaire.com. The amount of time I spend on the site is actually disgusting...and kind of has to do with the lack of things I need to accomplish, which is also at a sickeningly low level as of late. Although this evening I did do something of worth...filled in for the lovely Janet and coached a Rec & Ed volleyball team with the love of my life SWG.

The Tweeties were quite the group. First off, we had no idea who these girls were, we just walked into Tappan Middle School, got lost for a minor minute or two, and then stood awkwardly by the entrance of the gym just hoping and wishing that some girls would show up in the same t-shirts that I was swinging around in a plastic TJ Maxx bag. Thank heavens they did...about four minutes before the game started, but that's just a minor detail. Warm up was a free for all...we didn't have balls of our own...so we just grabbed the two random ones that were hanging out by the wall annnd it went from there. Slightly chaotic but ended alright. We beat the first team in all three games...the second team...opposite results, but I mean, I still had fun. I'm not so sure about them...sometimes difficult to read their expressions...especially due to the fact that SWG and I were so overexcited ourselves because we were in the volleyball atmosphere. Harumph. At least we came up with some good cheers...like "Thumbs up for greatness!" and "Totally Tweeties!" amongst the normal "Be aggressives" and "Team!s."

During one of the breaks we laid down the law and gave the girls a few life rules to live by...

1. Don't ever date a hockey player. Don't even go near the sport. Hockey ruins lives. It's our life motto. HRL. Learn it, love it, live it. If you do, I will personally put you out of your misery. No problem.
2. No drugs.
3. Go for everything.
4. Don't drink and drive.
5. Don't swear.
6. Know what deodorant you're wearing.
7. Always know what undies you have on.
8. Ooh I believe that was about all of em'!

P.S. WHAT IS WITH THAT NEW MCDONALD'S COMMERCIAL?! Pretty sure Michiganders are NOT that obsessed with the sport of hockey. I know I'M not. I mean, I was. I still kind of am. BUT IT STILL HOLDS TRUE that hockey ruins lives. But really, what does hockey have to do with McDonalds? They basically claimed Hockey as the God of the state of Michigan. Not even cool. I mean I realize all those hockey players have been smashed into the boards on a number of occasions from the beginning of time, which in turn has clearly caused some serious brain damage due to the lack of ability to live life like a normal person...but come on. Try a little harder. Mmmm okay yeah. HRL. That will be all.

Oh Happy Day America

It is officially the first Fourth of July I can remember where I am not at Huron Valley. Thank you Liz Hill. Hahaha gotta love the new rules out there, or not. It's not required. Anyways, besides being bored out of my mind and entirely lame for sitting around in red, white, and blue without a destination to celebrate during the day...there are a few upsides to being refused entry to my old summer home.

1. I will not be getting kicked in the face while my eardrums and lungs are on the verge of bursting so I can just get that one last penny in the coin dive.
2. I will not be disappointed if they hand out Tootsie Roll Pops as opposed to Blow Pops for the marked coins.
3. I will not feel nauseous but still want a pie after watching the pie eating contest.
4. My fingernails will not be painted ridiculously by all the little ones.
5. I will not have to take a shower to remove the raw egg that splats everywhere during the egg toss.
6. No need to worry about getting injured during the potato sack race...or the grapefruit race...potato and spoon race...etc.
7. I don't have to cross my fingers all day hoping someone won't drown.
8. Definitely won't get sunburned, and therefore reduce my risk of skin cancer...HA!
9. I won't be depressed when my (nonexistent) ping pong ball doesn't win the race down the creek...yet again.
10. Mosquitoes! Much less of those little buggers to worry about...safe and sound in my own bed.

Alright so it sucks. But really only a little bit. I was offered the chance to help the Faj wash his car, or clean the basement with Maj. Instead I finished a book, got halfway through another, and have become an avid solitaire player. Worldofsolitaire.com. It's kind of disgusting...my average keeps fluctuating in the 8% range. One of these days I'll make some serious upward progress, I can just feel it...

Degree Takes the Cake!

Today was one of those irritating days where it is gloomy and cloudy and terrible out, yet it just won't rain! So frustrating. I mean, if it has to be dark and gross, might as well complete the picture and add some precipitation. Right? It makes things a little bit more exciting...although it also adds the potential for Wet Pant Syndrome, which is one of the most horrible fake syndromes out there. The horror of the wet legs of your pants getting stuck to your calves and then the dirt that is brought with it, oooh it all is just a nightmare.

Anyhoo, I once again spent the day schlepping around Miss Jane and wasting time in the parking lot of the lovely Senior Center Park...which today I discovered has a pool as well! Who knew!? The whole chill factor was great because I could actually sit comfortably with the engine off and the windows cracked...as opposed to sweating away my life until I couldn't stand it anymore and then have to find another parking lot to sit in so I have an excuse to turn on the car and enjoy a few minutes of blasting the AC.

In other news, I got a new flavor of deodorant. And not only is it a new flavor, I also went with a new brand! The old Ban Paradise Winds was finally starting to fail slightly after many years of faithful service and I thought I could use a change. Degree Sexy Intrigue it is! Alright, now let's take a few to check out the fact that they named a product that is specifically tailored for your armpit and then named it SEXY Intrigue. What is sexy about my armpit? Perhaps Degree has the power to do that, I don't know. It's pretty magical. It smells really great...doesn't exactly halt the flow of perspiration like a dream but hey, what normal deodorant does? Still smells pretty lovely post-perspiration, and that's really the only thing that is non-negotiable in the deodorant search for perfection. So I'd say, ladies and gents, we have a winner!

Don't worry, I'll let you know how Secret Cocoa Butter Kiss works out when I decide to test that puppy out (I grabbed the 97 cent sample just for kicks). I know you'll be waiting on the edge of your seat...

FYI: The Medical Field Requires a Little Set of Necessary Social Skills

Well I thought I had graduated from the whole oral surgery debacle, buuuut no. Not quite. See, I went to visit Dr. Silvey for my twice annual teeth cleaning (can't forget about dental hygiene!) and let him know that hey, I think it's starting to swell again and it kinda hurts. Come to find out...it is infected...again. He poked and prodded with his terrible shiny, silver, and sharp tools that I have nightmares about and drained some of the nastiness and then shipped me off to see Dr. Fear again. IIII do not like that man. It just amazes me that people that cannot even be civil (let alone sociable) are allowed to get jobs in the health field. They are aware that they will be seeing people every single day for the majority of the day, right? Hmmm...perhaps the whole med school thing needs a disclaimer, a warning label if you will. Warning: People are involved in this profession. Learn to like them...or get out. That would suffice.

In other doctoral news, ran into good ol' Dr. Kadakia at Potbelly's annnd he actually knew who I was! Amazing I tell you, amazing. Mad props to Dr. Kadak. Hahahahaha. At least he knows how to converse and be normal...

Milk Was A Bad Choice

It's hot...

Don't worry though because I have my fan on speed three. Everything is going to be a-okay.

It's Monday...

Don't worry though because we started the "work" week off with a bang. No swim practice (and no case of the Mondays)! AKA eat Panera for two meals, shop at Target, play Guitar Hero, play some Trouble (what a great game! How soon I forget these things...), then a drop off at Huron Valley so I could feel really great about not being able to go in...sigh. OH! AND THE BACHELORETTE! Monday means The Bachelorette! So I shall be tuning in for two hours of greatness (don't worry, I'm well aware of the fact that it's pretty horrible and fails the majority of the time...buuut I still enjoy it...I'm not afraid to admit that part of things).

It's 2:30...

Don't worry though because my dentist appointment isn't until Wednesday and my OSCR meeting isn't until four. Oooh OSCR...what a horrible review you are going to receive...

It's June 22...

Don't worry though because there's over two months of summer to go...crazy that the Fourth is coming so quickly though!

Okay that's enough of that...it's more than likely that it got old by the end annnd I've also run out of things to say. Okay great.

This Whole Gregorka Zoo Thing is Becoming a Reality

The Gregorka Zoological Park annual Christmas (well really New Years) letter has been an ongoing joke for as long as I can remember. We are a highly anti-animal family (besides the allowance of our pet Brian)...err it's headed by very anti-animal people so it's really actually ridiculous that we refer to ourselves as a zoo. Hahaha I suppose we were enough to handle...without adding the zoo aspect on top of it all. ANYWAYS.

It all started with the bats (during some winter month...I think)...that we discovered due to Brian's apparent superior sense of hearing. Lots of little scratchy noises do not in fact always mean mice, you could be graced with the presence of the friendly batty creatures instead! Right so...we had Critter Control come and do their thing. Their thing otherwise known as install some sort of device which allows the birds of the night to peace out of the house, but not re-enter...in the spring...when they were done with the whole vacation from life known as hibernation (gosh how great would that be?!).

Anyways. We upgraded this summer to the peacock. Yes, a peacock. It was a female which kinda sorta sucks, cuz they don't have that flashy tail their male counterparts are graced with, but I'm not complaining. Apparently there are a few that just roam about southeast Michigan? I'm not too sure...I have eavesdropped and overheard so many different explanations of how they wound up on Ridgemor that I just go with my first explanation. It supposedly has exited the area...not sure if it got sick of the scenery around these parts or if it was forced to find some new walking grounds...but it's gone.

Finally we had the woodpecker rather recently. The highly intellectual bird flew into the garage, but couldn't seem to figure out how to get out. And it flipped out anytime anyone went near it, knocking its head on the ceiling (most likely causing even more damage to its tiny bird brain). Who knows. Faj backed his car out so that it wouldn't get bombed by little bird turds and then he rescued the thing. Now he's really proud of his efforts when it comes to this gigantic feat, so don't poke fun. Faj had the genius to chase Woody the Woodpecker around the garage, get it under the umbrella, and direct it out to a safe flight zone. Who knew. So many talents. It's mind-boggling at times.

So yes, perhaps we need to change the newsletter to the Gregorka Aviary...doesn't quite have the same ring though...

Rollercoaster Basement

Now, I'm all about the whole basement being finished thing...but it has its ups and downs:

1. UP: I am greeted by people I don't know on a daily basis.
2. DOWN: There are always cars in the driveway...which blocks my view out the window to see whether or not the Taurus is still here. This means I am forced to walk outside or upstairs to the window with the correct angled view to figure out if I'm stranded or not.
3. UP: I have the opportunity to hear snippets of some very interesting conversations.
4. DOWN: It's official. Those involved in the building line of work have no concept of hygiene. Not once has anyone washed their hands after using the bathroom...thank goodness the plumbing is installed downstairs so I don't have to tally that sad stat any longer.
5. UP: We're going to have a sweet basement...duh.
6. DOWN: I have to be half of an awkward three second conversation while workers walk through the mudroom en route to the bathroom.

But yes, we can see the light at the end of the tunnel for the basement. Carpet is coming soon, then some furniture, then a TV, and we should be pretty good to go...after the Brain and I clean every item on the dust ridden side and move it into the fancy new side...yaaay.

"I Apologize For My Grandma Being Wasted"

Wellp. Sarah and I made the trek up to Lincoln, MI (near Alpena) to visit Amy (Sarah's fellow Buff) and her wonderful grandparents (Bud and Sallie...with an 'ie')!

Lot's of parentheses back there...so ANYWAYS...the drive up went fairly well. We got all the way there...and then drove up and down Barlow Road (only for twenty minutes) looking for Fox Road...the elusive Fox Road. Golly gee. After even pulling in to the gated community of Lost Lake Woods and backing out because we thought we were wrong, we finally decided to stop at the Citgo down the way and chat up the folks behind the counter to figure out where the heck we were supposed to be. Turns out the gated community WAS Fox Road and that our intuition was correct. Why there was no street sign, I'm not quite sure. And I mean, MapQuest could have been a pal and thrown us a hint about the whole gated expanse of land that was to be our destination. Oh well, they are forgiven.

So, we arrived at our destination thanks to Amy coming to our rescue in the purple Tracker. Received a lovely salutation from the grands and then schlepped everything inside! We got the basement area...then got the tour since there were multiple ways to escape...so many doors! The cool spiral staircase took us through the bedroom, the back staircase took us through the garage, there was a door straight to the outdoor world from the basement...a little crazy. If there were ever a fire it would probably be hard to choose!

For our first activity we took the neighbor's golf cart out to tour the Lost Lake Woods' surroundings...played in a park, almost died sliding around on gravel, scoped out the club house, and enjoyed the freezing cold gray weather. Then we went on into Alpena to take a look around. Twas a cute place! Stopped at Lake Huron for a quick gander and feel of the water, picked up t-shirts to tie dye at KMart and then stopped in Jo Ann Fabric for the actual dye supplies (which took an eternity because the lady couldn't work the register and I was trying to get the sale price...gee whiz), toured the little town, and then headed back for some dinner! Beer in the Rear Chicken it was! YUM. Had some of that, did some tie dying, and then played a rousing game of dominoes. I was doing well...until the end rounds...but I ended up in third place so it was alright.

Day two...woke up to the rain, so our horseback riding time slot was moved to the following day. Boo. We just hung out most of the day...ate a little, watched a lot of TV, counted down the minutes until The Bachelorette was to be on, went out to the stables to see the horses (since I had never been in close proximity of one...AHH) and fell in love with Johnny, played with the barn cats, more TV, a trip to the store in Lincoln for cake mix, frosting, marshmallow fluff, chips, and my favorite Queso (MMM!), hamburgers for dinner, cupcake creation, BACHELORETTE! (thank goodness the two stupidest ones were finally kicked...took long enough), stupid storm warnings that interrupted our viewing experience and didn't even pertain to our area, a lot of cupcake consumption, and then bed.

Day three, the final day. :( Got up for a great breakfast at Connie's. A HUGE cinnamon roll that the three of us split (SO good and nutty and delicious) at the cute local little place (we were surrounded by pretty much just old men...and one old woman). Hung out there for awhile and then headed back to prepare for the horseback riding experience...woah nervous. Since the Maj is terrified of horses, we've never ridden them, much less gotten very close to them so I was slightly shaking in my tennis shoes. I was given Cinnamon...the horse that likes people but not other horses...so I had to be in the back so no one was all up in his rear on the trail. Anyways...Cinnamon loves to look around and take in the scenery rather than focus on keeping up with the rest of the group. We had a grand ol' time lollygagging around in the back, grabbing meals to go along the way, until she would realize that 'Oh hey, look how far away the rest of the horses are, maybe I should catch up or something' and then would start RUNNING to catch up. Oooh boy. I was only thwapped by a few tree branches, only got one scrape from when she tripped and I hit the saddle funny with my hand, and naturally my butt is RATHER bruised. Yikes. But all in all, it was really fun! I didn't know I would actually like horses...and who knew their noses were so soft? Hahahaha.

After that experience we headed back to the home unit, ate some chips and queso, and packed up to leave. :( The attempt to get home was a little bit more difficult than getting up there...

We didn't have the MapQuest directions for the opposite direction, but we're not THAT dumb so we figured we could do it...we got a ways out there...about an hour, when we encountered a stoplight. Now, there aren't very many stoplights up in those parts and I remembered a Subway attached to a Shell station, so we took our turn here...turns out it was not correct. It took about a half an hour to fix that one, but it was fine once we got back on track and we found a lot more lakes hidden back there! So yeah...turns out there were three stoplights in this 20-some mile stretch annnd yeah. Oh well. Then it was smooth sailing the rest of the way thank goodness.

Now I'm home! And sore in the buttocks region...but glad to be back in the company of warm weather...the whole low 40s and rainy stuff, not so great in the summertime...

An Evening of Crack

Last night proved to be filled with a lot of butt humor...

Coming home from downtown I witnessed an interesting couple engage in a short grope session. Tall skinny dude and a rather large and in charge woman on the corner...the dude's hand traveled all over her back, slowly creeping toward the badonkadonk. Don't worry, cuz it made it there! He proceeded to be allll over her ass for the entire "Don't Walk" period of time. Really sir? You do realize that you are not Invisiboy and that other people in DOWNTOWN ANN ARBOR have a clear view of what behavior you are choosing to engage in!? Yikes. Sometimes I wonder.

Then pulling into the good ol' street to home base, my eyes were greeted with the neighbor's butt crack. While working hard with the pile of mulch and trying to distribute it, this dude's pants were slip sliding south allowing Captain Crack to come out and play. Such a wonderful welcome home image, every street corner should get one.

Updates on the witch factor (otherwise known as my black hair):

• Momma Jann did some online research for me last night and we found out that Prell shampoo fades the color faster...therefore, I went to CVS this morning and picked up some Prell. Promptly showered and washed my hair another six times (I try to wash it six times per shower) and found out that the Prell smell is not my favorite. I am currently waiting for it to dry...
• I am considering going Goth for the time being, just to match my hair, and to please the Faj.
• I received a compliment from the Faj about my original hair color last night (this is a rare occurrence folks!)...this was followed up by Faj informing me that I wouldn't be needing a car and that I could use the Family Broomstick to get to Sarah's last night.
• Brian continues to yak about witch hazel...and yell "WITCH! SHE'S A WIIITCH!"
• Now I know why I always said I would never dye my hair. Oh well!

Vollis? Tenneyball? Tenneyball. Definitely tenneyball.

So. We played this game...err I guess we performed (?) this drill last night called Tennis at volleyball practice last night. Yeah I don't know what the whole hybrid sports thing is about either, but I mean, I went with it. So you have two people on each side of the net, and you face off in a doubles match. And naturally each side only gets one wallop to get the ball over the net. The whole point of it was to practice placement, but I went a wee bit nuts and was having a few issues. There was a swing and a near miss at one point (which I justified by saying that my platform to volleyball ratio should be equivalent to the ratio of the tennis ball to the racket...right? Common sense people), followed up by my participation as a plain ol' spectator (and a good one at that!) while my partner Annie tore up the court. Clearly I was never victorious, which is fine. I guess. 

SWG and I dyed my hair (don't worry, it washes out eventually...it just might take awhile). It's pretty much straight up black. As in, I look like a witch slash sorceress. Mhmmm. Yes Brian has his fun running around yelling "SHE'S A WITCH! WIIITCH!!!!" and asking me if my favorite plant is witch hazel. Clearly my favorite plant is witch hazel. Who doesn't love them some witch hazel. Anyways. The upside is that if you're ever so lucky to be in the same place at the same time as me, I'll be really clean. I shampooed six times this morning in the shower and I take at least two showers a day...if not more. I will admit that it is kind of fun to watch the purply-black color exit the hairs on my head through the froth of the shampoo. Another plus is that I'm also thinking of hosting my own Halloween in June trick-or-treatingpalooza. Because why not? I don't even have to wear a wig! I will go into it full well knowing that it will be an epic fail of an adventure, but A for effort, for myself. Oh geez, what am I saying. 

I am having the WORST shuffle experience of my life on iTunes as I type out this post on my horribly boring life. I don't know what I want to listen to (hence, I'm making the application do the work for me) and every song that comes on is not really pleasing to the ear canals as of right now. So basically, I just press next until I get tired of pressing the button and continue typing...typing merrily. Merrily due to the fact that ladies and gents, we just landed on a Christmas tune! Oh Holy Night to be exact. Yes, it is that bad. 

I Hate My Mouth

Well. The wisdom teeth saga continues...

After surgery I used up my entire pain prescription, part of Brian's, and half of a new stronger prescription. Brian consumed ONE pill, for the whole process. ONE. Zoinks. So then. I got dry sockets...yaaay. So that took a couple more painful visits to pack them with that horrible stuff that tastes like cloves and ruins every single meal you attempt to eat. We threw out those glorious looking socks that hold ice packs and velcro around your face thinking everything would be a-okay! Then I peaced to Florida, syringe in hand, thinking everything would be just dandy! Annnd it was. Until I got back. 

So a couple days ago it felt like something was lodged back there but for the life of me I could not get access to it because the hole was so tiny and well, I'm no oral surgeon. So today I wake up and my cheek has assumed the chipmunk position. Just the right side. So I'm a lopsided chipmunk and in pain and I have cloves in my mouth again and a largo prescription for amoxicillin. Again. So great.

Cursed I am. At least I'm pretty sure. Although things have to stop going wrong at some point right? Right. Ugh.

Stakeout of Sorts...

I do declare that today is blogworthy. So. Here we are.

Started off the day with some "lifting" at the Polo Fields gym with Sammy and Sarah...which mainly consisted of watching the spelling bee on ESPN and beating the children on the screen...needless to say, we were pretty proud of our spelling skills and kind of really upset that we never got the chance to show off our skills on television. But we got over it...mostly.

Then on the way back to home base, Sarah and I witnessed a couple of police cars beginning the takeover of the Wagner and Liberty intersection...clearly we were pretty curious and will be checking out the newspaper to satisfy that little need to know. Anyways. By the time Brian and I left to go back out that way there were approximately six police cars stationed all around this intersection. Now, either the county police were extremely bored and just decided that this intersection was the new hip hangout, or something kind of serious was happening. I was hoping to actually witness whatever was supposed to transpire, but of course I was not so lucky. So besides the fact that that was extremely pointless since I can't figure out why they were really there, feel free to inform me if you find out.

Onward with the day...headed out to Emerson to perform some simple slave labor. Putting together stationary bundles to thank the volunteers...believe me. There are A LOT of volunteers. I'm just wondering if I get one of those for putting them all together! Hahaha not really. But kind of. 

Okay so maybe today wasn't blogworthy. But I feel like I've been lacking on the posts as of late. Nothing very humorous seems to be happening...or at least nothing worth reporting! 

Time for volleyball. Peace and love.

One Dollar, Bob!

I have returned from the great state of Florida...and the lovely Islamorada Key. Twas a grand vacation with my second family, the WGs and all their glory! Learned a few things along the way...including the fact that iguanas can swim...and I guess need to be near a pool in order to drop a load, which really adds to the whole natural landscape part of things, but not exactly appreciated to the highest degree. 

The trip began with the plane ride out. I was plopped between Little Miss Sarah and a man on the larger side who came to be known as Sir Hairy Arms in my book. He conked out just after take off, with a successful takeover of the armrest and beyond, and the lovely large curly hairs on his arm started their trek to annoy me, which as most of you know takes little to no effort. 

It was a mix of sunshine and rain, but always hot (and I was so acclimated to the warm climate that I have spent the entire day walking around in shorts, a t-shirt, socks, and a blanket due to the chilly sensation that Michigan is compared to the Keys)! We had a couple of power outages to add some excitement into the swing of things, which led to games of Quiddler by emergency light...speaking of which, somehow, someway, I beat Momma Jann in a game of Quiddler! The winning combination of "claw me thin boy" shot my score through the roof toward victory! Amazing. I can quite honestly say that I never saw that one coming!

Delicious food was consumed throughout the week (naturally)...thanks to all our friends from under the sea. Poppa Joel caught some largo dolphin for dinner one night...tres delicioso. I don't even know what language that is, but it's totally fine. Pretty sure it's Spench...mmm no I like Franish better. See if you can figure that one out...I do hope you can because otherwise, we may or may not be able to continue life as we know it...whhhhat am I saying.

Time out on the boat was glorious! Minus the fact that we were assaulted by the sun...oops...but it was sweet! The ride out was roller coaster-esque, and we only had to stop once for a pee break in the middle of the ocean to avoid a potential accident of the teensing variety. The whole attempt at catching a fish was kind of a failure...but I did see a big fatty leap out of the waves which was cool, a bunch of cool fish pointed out by Captain Joel, and we witnessed some dolphins frolicking among the deep blue...well, it wasn't that deep where we were at that point, but that's okay. 

A Few Key Observations (haha)...and such:

• Nearly everyone in the Keys has a dog. Unreal. 
• Some even get to travel in strollers...or the designated shopping carts that are provided
• Mullets aplenty. So great.
• Iguanas can swim, but we've been over that already. So gross.
• It is in fact possible to overeat every single night at dinner. 
• The winner of the Key Lime Pie Contest this year was Islamorada Fish Co. Top notch cashew crust really brought it to a whole new level.
• Barbie can be beat, at least when it comes to solitaire.
• Gingerly touching tips is a necessity in life.
• Geckos are extremely elusive creatures. In other words, they're just way too fast to catch.
• Dawn and her old lady friends are all loud talkers.
• Mecca still is a sight to see. And a beautiful one at that.
• Pretty much every radio station plays oldies tunes. So solid.
• The WGs rock.

Well. I suppose I should probably go eat dinner or do something productive...but who are we kidding, I have nothing that needs to get done! Ahhh summer life. Simply greatness in a season.